How Parents Can Help Their Child Who Is Being Bullied
By Gina Cipriano
The effects of bullying on a child can negatively influence their ability to feel safe in the world. Physical forms of bullying can entail hitting, punching, or hurting someone. While during emotional bullying nobody gets physically injured, it can still cause a child considerable distress. Emotional bullying entails name calling, teasing, and making fun of someone. Finally, social bullying entails negatively influencing someone’s social status. In recent years, cyberbullying has become prevalent. Bullying does not just stop at school; it can be brought home with a child through social media and other online platforms. Statistically speaking, cyberbullying tends to be highest in middle school years and will lower during high school (Beale & Hall, 2007). Bullying can be considered an adverse childhood experience, which are traumatic situations that occur during childhood (Urbanski, 2019).
Bullying may not just affect someone as a child (even if the bullying stops during childhood). The negative effects can carry into adulthood as people who have endured adverse childhood experiences are more at risk for mental health issues later in life. Children who are being bullied may exhibit the following symptoms:
• Anxiety • Depression • Suicidal thoughts • Somatic symptoms (i.e. stomach aches and headaches) • Avoiding school • Isolating themselves from others • Becoming bullies themselves
Parents can take some of the following actions if their child is being bullied:
• Learn common IM abbreviations to recognize if children are hiding bullying behaviors (such as “PIR” which stands for “parent in room”) (Beale & Hall, 2007)• Help child report the harassing messages to the internet service provider (Beale & Hall, 2007) • Talk to school personnel if bullying or cyberbullying is occurring from another student at the school• Engage in social media co-use o Social media co-use refers to parents using social media platforms with their child (at the same time), which has been shown to be more effective than reducing screen time (Beale & Hall, 2007; Helfrich et al., 2020). o Co-use can be used as a way to monitor children and elicit conversations about the positive and negative consequences of social media use. For instance, a parent can watch a Tik Tok video with their child and talk to their child about the video. It can form as both a connection point and as a way to open future conversations about harmful videos. • Increase open and flexible forms of communication (Beale & Hall, 2007; Helfrich et al., 2020)o Parent-child communication has been shown to be more effective in preventing cyber bullying than monitoring children’s online use• Empower children to stand up for others when they see them being victimized (Beale & Hall, 2007; Helfrich et al., 2020).
Therapy can assist parents in opening lines of communication with their child if additional help is needed. Further, it can assist a child in developing confidence, perspective taking skills, and assertiveness to decrease the negative consequences bullying had on them.
References:Beale, A. V., & Hall, K. R. (2007). Cyberbullying: What school administrators (and parents) can do. The Clearing House: A Journal of Educational Strategies, Issues and Ideas, 81(1), 8-12.Helfrich, E. L., Doty, J. L., Su, Y. W., Yourell, J. L., & Gabrielli, J. (2020). Parental views on preventing and minimizing negative effects of cyberbullying. Children and Youth Services Review, 118, 105377.Urbanski, J. (2019). Bullying is an adverse childhood experience. Journal of Health Science & Eduction, 3(1), 1-2.Therapy for child bullying. Child psychologist in Jupiter, FL.
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